My name is Paul and you are listening to The Great Coaches podcast.
Where we explore Leadership through the lens of high performance sport, by interviewing great coaches from around the world to try and find ideas to help all of us lead our teams better.
We started this podcast because we wanted to have better conversations with our families around the dinner table.
In a social media world, where the goal is often to be the star of the show; we wanted to change the conversation, and talk more about selflessness, leadership and responsibility.
And the people we knew who best exhibited these qualities were Great Sports Coaches.
As the podcast has grown, the Great Coaches we have interviewed have shared so much insight and wisdom that we decided to create episodes dedicated entirely to the lessons that have resonated with us the most.
Today’s episode is on the topic of Coaching Self Reflection , and it features audio quotes from a selection of coaches that we have interviewed from around the world.
One of the early interviews we did was with a Rugby 7’s coach called Damien McGrath. Damien had coached the national teams of 5 countries and written 3 books, and as a result is very good at communicating in a short succinct manner, that cuts straight to the heart of the matter.
We caught him at the start of the pandemic, when he was laid up in Germany recovering from a leg injury and away from his family, and so by his own admission he was in a reflective mood. That day he said 2 things that helped shape many of the interview questions we would ask afterwards.
The first was this in relation to criticism; where he said quote Don't listen to the people in the stands, or you'll end up sitting next to them. Quote.
And the 2nd was about the importance of self-relfection.
Damian McGrath 24:43
Your questions that sort of sparked an interest in being laid up here. I've started I think about coaching from sort of a leadership point of view more and more and I don't think I think there's as coaches we should do that. We should you should document What you do all the time, I know everybody who's successful is a self reflective or should be. But I don't think sometimes we document the things we go through and how it leads to change and how we manage that change and how we sort of where you have to be fluid and how you move forward. It's a worthwhile task.
To this point I hadn’t realised self-reflection was so important, but afterwards I spent time researching it, and asking other coaches about their views on self-reflection, and what emerged was 2 things. First the importance of mirrors; and secondly the importance of doing it first as a leader, before you engage anyone else with feedback.
Here is Soccer coach Tanya Oxtoby.
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Tanya Oxtoby 00:00
And we want that we want players that look at themselves first think about what they can change what they could have done better. What they did really well. And were then looking to add to that because as coaches we should be doing the same thing we should be looking. I know when we don't perform well or we lose a game. First thing I do is think Oh, what did I do wrong there? Did I set us up right did I? Did I get the opposition analysis wrong straightaway, you should be looking at yourself first and then start to look outwardly
As humans we are often our harshest critic; but great coaches are able to move beyond this very quickly and look for the learning so that they are able to improve next time. In fact, they are very good at the loop of reflect, learn and move on; and use it to fuel their own development. Here is Sandy Brondello reflecting on this loop and how she uses it with her kids as well.
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Sandy Brondello 00:00
But that's why I told you is like, oh, it's not about I don't blame other players always blame myself on my hardest critic. There's things I could have done better. I don't point the finger on what can I do better. So that's why I look at it and like, Okay, I need to be better. And it's, you know, continue, you're not going to win every single game. But there's always lessons to be learned every single game. And that's what I do as I reflect, and then I learn and then I move on to the next game and hopefully I can be better. And that's why when I was a player every single day, I went to work to be the best I could be. I wasn't trying to be, you know, someone else on my team beat them out. It's no different as a coach. I want to make sure I'm learning from those experiences and making sure I do a better job next time. It's and I try and pass it on to my kids, because you know, they just want things to come too easy. You know, you're not going to get satisfaction if things are too easy in life.
Eddie Jones builds on what Sandy has to say, by making the link that its not just teams that have to evolve, but coaches too; and in fact if you don’t take the time to reflect on how you will improve you will eventually peter out.
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Eddie Jones 00:02
It's almost like the whole world's been taken back to the base. And teams are literally in plays and literally is starting again. So there's this great opportunity this moment to really evolve what you're doing as a team in terms of your training, in terms of the game in terms of the way you operate. And that relates to coaches too. You've got to you've got to keep thinking about right how can I evolve myself as a coach, how can I keep getting better as a coach, and unless you do that you are going to die?
In the March 2022 edition of the Harvard Business Review there was an article that featured research on the impact of self-reflection on the development of 442 Business leaders. It found that if you don’t take time to rest and reflect on what you have learned, then you will fatigue and this will impact your development and performance.
Beverly Priestman coached the Canadian Womens team to a gold medal at the Tokyo Olympics and she proves this finding by explaining how it was the downtime during the early part of the pandemic that allowed her to be clear on who she was and what she wanted to achieve.
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Bev Priestman 00:00
So in that pandemic, I locked myself in a room. I developed like who I am as a person, what are my values? What will my culture look like? How do I want to play? And so I articulated this and became really, really clear about who I am what I was going to be about, should that first senior head coaching position come up and obviously candidate that came calling from a previous time there and I felt really ready, refreshed and clear to take on that position.
James Wade led the Chicago Sky to the 2021 WNBA championship, and he connected the routine of self reflection with heightened self- accountability; and how this spurs him on to express his short comings in front of the team, and as we are learning more through sociology research and people like Brene Brown; vulnerability as a leader builds trust and elevates team performance.
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James Wade 00:00
Self accountability. The easiest thing for a coach to do is after a game is to go look at the stat sheet or look at video and say, hey, look, we didn't do this, write this, write this, write this, write this write. The first thing I do after, again, whether we win or lose, it's okay, what could I have done better? I look at myself first and foremost in the mirror. When we go back to the locker room, before I go talk to the coaches, I say, Okay, I didn't do this, I was bad at this tonight, I can do this better. And then I approached the team say, hey, look, as a group, we can do this better, whether it be our energy, or whether it be attention to detail and in schemes or whatever it may be, whether it be us playing together, I'll hold them to that, but I also hold myself accountable in front of them as well. Because I make a lot of mistakes. I think we get this false sense of the coach is always right all the time. And if you're not always right, I mean, you're not a good coach, and I'm self aware of who I am. I'm self aware of my shortcomings. And I don't mind talking about them, because I know that an ever evolving person and so I'm trying to get it right
Michelle Clark-Heard is a American basketball coach and she also makes the connection between self-reflection and vulnerability with the team, and adds to it by explaining how it helps her find common ground with the other people in the organisation.
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Michelle Clarke-Heard 00:00
There's always individuals and people sometimes that don't know how to express themselves or they sometimes have a fear of like just wanting to be who they are. And I just really love letting people understand and know that it's okay to be different. It's okay to have who you are. But let's just find that common space where we both can be who we are. And I always tell my players all the time, I look at myself in the mirror first, you have to be very vulnerable, and you have to get them to understand that and just a lot of backstories
As a leader there will be times when you will have to move on from a team, either voluntarily or not; and self reflection can you help keep perspective on what you were able to achieve even though the job may not have been finished. Here is NBA coach Joe Prunty.
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Joe Prunty 00:00
I think one of the biggest things regardless of how you leave a team is can you look yourself in the mirror and say you did the best that you could while you were there? And did you do the best that you could with the things that you were presented at that time? So I think that's a huge part of it is looking yourself in the mirror and knowing that you did what you could
But there can be no denying that self-reflection can hurt, particularly if you can identify reasons why someone in your care did not reach their potential. Here is the legendary swimming coach Bill Sweetenham describing how this feeling effects him.
02_3.2_Sweetenham
Bill Sweetenham 00:00
When every athlete retires, I go in and look in the mirror and ask myself, did I get the best out of that athlete? No excuses. I can't say that I get the best out of that athlete to anytime six sessions a week. But I get the best out of the athlete who really didn't draw her. I can't do that. I can't rationalize that. I have to go in and look in the mirror and prove to us have a 50 years of experience and so did I achieve without rationalization without excuses without compromise? Get that athlete their best result? And if I can't do that, then I'd file whether the highest talent in the pool of the least talent provided they're both committed to the training system that you've asked them to do. So whenever I fall short, it hurts it leaves a scar
Building your own process for self re;fecting will help it become a key part of your routine as a leader. Here is Helene Wilson explaingin how she goes about this.
Helene Wilson 05:00
Yeah, I think first of all, you've got to self reflect as a coach. So that's a skill. And if you don't have a process for self reflecting, then you're not going to grow your awareness around what you're doing as a coach, or could you be doing things better? But you got to be careful that self reflection isn't ruminating. So you're not just sitting on things and overthinking things, because that's not healthy either. So I always think to myself, What have I done in practice today? Why have I done it? What's working? What's not? So I have a process where I'm going over those things? And what have I noticed? Which is a really powerful question in what could I do differently? When I think about those questions, and when you you reflect in that way, at my post some more questions, too, but they're questions that you can put to your group or the people that are around you. And then you can lever off the support and expertise, you have to be better. If you're having a critical conversation, or a difficult conversation with someone else rather than yourself, I've always thought what's the stance that I need to take. So you can take a stance of advocating what you need to discuss an honest or critical conversation. But you can also take the stance of inquiry and inquiry with questions and questions are a great way to get people on the same level as you. So depending on what the outcome of what you're reflecting on yourself, what your contribution was to the situation, and then how you need to engage with someone else, you need to be really careful about the stance that you take to just bring that critical conversation and honest conversation to the forefront. [PB1]
The final word on self reflection comes from Lisa Alexander who captures an idea many of the great coaches talked about: journaling as a way to capture experiences and examine them for learning.
01_01.6_Alexander
Lisa Alexander 00:00
I'm a educator. So I'm always optimistic that people can learn this. And I think it goes back to that the writing the journal is actually writing down those issues or experiences that have been tough and really examining them instead of not facing them. I've often written down my challenges and the things that have really confronted me and what I needed to do, which has been very helpful. So it's sort of like having your own copilot that sort of helps you to navigate the tough times
We hope you enjoyed our episode on Self Reflection and found one or two things that you can bring to your own dinner table, locker room or boardroom table for discussion.
The key lessons I have taken on away on the topic of Self Reflection from our interview guests are:
· Look at yourself first, and reflect on how you performed before giving feedback to others.
· It’s important to not dwell on personal criticism though, but rather to focus on the loop of reflect, learn and move on.
· Finding time to reflect will not only help your development and performance, but it will help you manage fatigue.
· Self-Reflection can help build personal accountability when it comes to key goals, and help you achieve compromise within the team
· And journaling where you write down your thoughts and observations is a good way to start the practice of self reflection.
Here are the Great Coaches podcast, we are always trying to reflect and learn , so Please let us know if you have any feedback,
Just like PONKO Ngoumo from France who said: Great Podcast: Merci pour ce programme trčs enrichissant…
Thanks Ponko
The interaction with the people around the world who listen gives us great energy, and so if you have any feedback or comments please let us know. And all the details on how to connect with us, are in the show notes or on our website, thegreatcoachespodcast.com.
[PB1]02_3.2_Wilson